The Stag

http://www.staghotel.com.au/

I guess a restaurant that offers about 800 different steak cuts can be forgiven for skimping a little on the schnitzel. And in hindsight, coming to the Stag and ordering anything other than a steak is just illogical. Basically, what I’m getting at is that the schnitzels here weren’t very good. Expensive, pretty average size, not a lot of flavour. Chips are ok though, and the bar itself is very presentable and conveniently located.

The Verdict: This is Adelaide’s number one steak restaurant. There is a steak here to suit everybody’s taste, hunger, personality, blood type, sexual orientation, whatever. Not a happy hunting ground for the schnitzel connoisseur though.

Taste 3/5, Size 2.5/5, Value 2.5/5, Sides 3.5/5, Experience 4/5
Total 62%

The Archer

http://www.archerhotel.com.au/

Greetings schnitzel aficionados,

One of my favourite things about the meal we all love so, is that a good schnitty is an appropriate meal for almost every occasion. Be you in the mood for a massive feast, a quick meal before a footy match, brunch with your Grandmother or a romantic dinner, the schnitzel will always fit the bill. Today’s outing took Mark and I to a pub for our friend Dave’s birthday – and this time, it’s a Sunday lunch that we’re after. And what could go down better on a lazy Sunday afternoon than a lovely big schnitzel?

The Archer Hotel, the second time pub we’ve visited in North Adelaide, has a lovely atmosphere, and despite the fact that it’s a bit cold, the company is very warm today. It was to be a significant day for me – see I’ve always loved a good chicken schnitzel, no matter the topping! Chicken schnitzel with gravy, chicken schnitzel with mushroom gravy, ‘Mexican style’ chicken schnitzel, ‘Hawaiian style’ chicken schnitzel – and my favourite topping of all – parmigiana. And of course, a beef schnitzel can really hit the spot as well – especially with gravy or pepper sauce. But there’s one combination I’ve never been game to try – a beef schnitzel, with parmigiana sauce.

“A beef parmi?” I question my friends in the queue waiting to order - “Surely that’s just going to be strange?” But, quivering with anxiety, and out of love for you, the reader, I place my order. Did the bartender look at me like I was a big of a weirdo, or did I just imagine it? Prepare to learn, first hand, whether or not the beef parmi is any match for its more popular counterpart.

Twenty minutes later and things aren’t looking good - no schnitzel has yet appeared in front of me. Good conversation can only keep a man occupied for so long, and without food soon I’ll begin to get bored. A friend of Dave’s, who I’ve just met – Richard – has ordered a coffee to sustain him for the long wait. Unfortunately for him, the coffee has arrived lukewarm – despite a specific order that it be served ‘hot’. “This is really disappointing”, he was heard to remark.

The time seems to passing by very slowly, we’re managing to keep ourselves sane by watching a fly buzzing around the room. Finally, our meals arrive – and we are eating a full half-hour after our orders are made. Mark’s chicken schnitzel is of a respectable size, is presented nicely and tastes like it should. My beef parmigiana goes down surprisingly well – I would recommend that, if you ever find yourself not feeling like a chicken parmigiana (unlikely), that the beef be a viable alternative.

The meals are of average size, we would have been disappointed had we been out for dinner, but for a ‘lunch schnitzel’ these were appropriate. The chips and salad provided are ample, and tasty, while nothing out of the ordinary.

The Verdict: The Archer certainly knows how to make a schnitzel, and I would certainly recommend a visit for a nice lunch. If you’re looking for a big dinner, however, I would probably look elsewhere.

Size 3.5/5, Taste 4/5, Sides 3.5/5, Value 3.5/5, Experience 3/5
Total 70%

The Royal Hotel Kent Town

http://www.theroyalhotel.net.au/

Ten-dollar schnitzels. All day. Every day. Great, I thought, but where’s the catch? Do I eat the schnitzel, then wake up three days later without my kidneys? It seemed too good to be true. Although from past experience, ten dollar schnitties tend to lack the size and quality of their more expensive counterparts. Fair to say I walked into the hotel with my expectations fairly low.

The actual hotel itself was quite nice, with a sophisticated restaurant complemented by a spacious beer garden. And although the meal we were served up with tonight was by no means hanging off our plate, or unmatched in taste, I have no regrets about parting ways with my ten dollars. For a start, the restaurant had a salad bar – a rarity so far in our travels. It was nothing extraordinary (couscous salad, garden salad, watermelon, potato bake, pumpkin etc), but certainly added to the experience.

The meal itself wasn’t brilliantly presented, nor were the chips or schnitzel size anything to be excited about. The schnitzel was fairly thin, although quite tasty. The seafood topping, which consisted of three different types of fish in a creamy sauce, certainly gets points for creativity. Considering that we paid little more than a bus fare for our meal, I’m calling tonight a winner.

The Verdict: Certainly value for money, and not the worst ten-dollar schnitzel going around.

Taste 4/5, Size 3/5, Value 4.5/5, Sides 3.5/5, Experience 3.5/5
Total 74%

The Tap Inn

http://www.tapinn.com.au/

All the times I’ve been to the Tap Inn for drinks, and I’ve never had a schnitzel there. For the shame. But tonight I finally righted that wrong, and with positive results. I was served up with the thickest chicken schnitzel that I’ve encountered so far on this culinary voyage of discovery. The meat hadn’t been processed or battered and flattened to oblivion. Nor had it been disdainfully tossed into a deep-fryer and served on a plate, still dripping with oil, when it looked ready. No, this was a thick, succulent, real chicken breast, nicely crumbed and fried to perfection. A delicious meal, which didn’t leave me feeling completely stuffed afterwards.

It was served up with one of the most colourful salads I’ve ever encountered – consisting of every imaginable type of capsicum, along with tomato, cucumber and fetta. It was a complete contrast to most other salads, which are basically just lettuce. The chips were quite nice, with a tasty herb seasoning, although a few more would have been nice. Overall, for $20 (including gravy), I feel as though I got my money’s worth.

The Tap Inn itself is a quality place, with outdoor seating, front bar, semi-casual &formal dining areas and an indoor driving range for golf enthusiasts. A good place to go, no matter what sort of event you are organising.

The Verdict: This was a very high quality schnitzel, which left me satisfied, but not too full.

Taste 5/5, Size 4/5, Value 3.5/5, Sides 4/5, Experience 4/5
Total 82%